Prompt #11Trimester 1

Prompt 11: The "When Do I Announce?" Decision Framework

When to use it

You want to tell people you're pregnant but you're stuck between "waiting for the safe zone" and wanting support now. You want a framework, not a rule.

The Prompt

I'm [N] weeks pregnant and trying to decide who to tell when. My situation:
- Pregnancy risk: [E.G., "low-risk so far, heartbeat at 9 weeks" / "high-risk due to age/history"]
- My emotional state: [E.G., "I want to celebrate NOW" / "I'm superstitious about jinxing it" / "I need help and can't do this alone"]
- My partner's preference: [E.G., "wants to wait" / "told his mom already" / "no preference"]
- Work situation: [E.G., "I work in a high-physical-demand job" / "I work remote" / "I need to tell HR for accommodations"]
- Close support I have: [E.G., "my mom lives nearby" / "I have 2 close friends who'd drop everything" / "I don't have local support"]

Please give me:
1. A tiered announcement plan (who to tell when, in order):
   - Tier 1: People I'd want to know even if I miscarry (partner, therapist, etc.)
   - Tier 2: People who give me active support during T1 (close friends, family)
   - Tier 3: Wider announcement (work, social media)
2. The actual miscarriage rate by week (so I'm working from data, not superstition)
3. The question to ask myself: am I waiting to protect myself, or to perform "doing it right"?
4. What to say at work (and when) — specific language
5. The "I told people and then miscarried" plan (because we don't talk about this enough)

Important: I want a framework that fits my life, not a one-size-fits-all rule.

Example output

*"Tier 1 (tell now): partner, therapist, OB/midwife. Tier 2 (tell by 12-13 weeks): 2-3 close people who'd actually show up if you needed help. Tier 3 (after anatomy scan at 18-20 weeks): wider circle, work, social. Miscarriage rate drops to ~1% after 13 weeks with normal progression. Work: tell HR around 14-16 weeks if you need accommodations; you don't legally need to tell them until later if you don't. The question: 'Am I protecting myself, or am I performing pregnancy correctly?' Both are valid. The 'if I miscarry' plan: same message you sent when you told them ('I wanted you to know — I'm going through a loss. I'm okay, but I'd love [specific help: meals, no check-ins for a week, just texts]')."*

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